Friday, August 14, 2015

Is This Thing On??



Sometimes I feel like I am talking and talking and I never listen to myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm a pretty good pep-talker, but my success rate is somewhat diminished when I am the audience. My inspirational speeches usually peak in the evening and wane as I sleep. Then I wake up in the morning with taste buds that have somehow managed to obtain bullhorns and are exuberantly extolling the merits of cold pizza for breakfast. On top of that, my ear-balls repeatedly demonstrate selective amnesia. They remember how lovely a pile of french fries can be, but seem to forget all of the reasons they heard the night before on why I should be eating healthy. The cream on top? My all-or-nothing personality. It sits on my shoulder like a mini-me with horns and whispers in my ear, telling me "Look what you did...welp! Its over now. Might as well find a nice comfy spot and make a happy plate out of that platter of cookies!" 

Yeah...so...this is my attempt to stop the cycle of madness. Get off this road to nowhere. It's time to fish or cut bait, pee or get off the pot, put up or shut up. Time to make it hap'n, cap'n!

So this week I am making some goals. Let's start small so we don't get overwhelmed and run into the night screaming. (Well, maybe more like mall-walk fast into the night. I mean, I am doing this because I am grossly overweight, so running is probably not...practical.)

Goal #1! And this is so hard for me. You have no idea how hard...I mean THIS is my Everest. I can't have diet Coke anymore. It's (figuratively) literally killing me. This is why I won't have a ton of goals this week. Just thinking about not sipping that sweet nectar of the soda gods...never having that bubbly sensation as the cup gets close to me and fizzes in my face...forever missing the 3 o'clock pick me up that gets me through a shift...oh diet Coke - why are you so delicious? Doesn't matter. It's irrelevant. I'm dropping you like it's hot. Kicking you to the curb. Run home to ya momma. The honeymoon is over, and we're getting annulled. *sniff - if you will excuse me, I need to take a minute to listen to some Sarah - I will remember yoooou!!!



Ok! Goal#2! Record my food every day! I mean, how hard is this?! Most of the time, I just get lazy but I have to be able to stick with this. And the goal is to record it all, no matter if I go over my cals or not. This WILL happen.

And thats it for me! Don't judge me, man. Have I not explained my weaknesses to you? I may have left out that I tend to go all in, fail, get discouraged and then give up. And, don't forget that mini-me sits on that shoulder, telling me that since I have messed up once I just might as well keep on going! Bring on the junk food! Sigh...

So I am starting small and working myself up to the grand finale. Wanna take a ride with me? I think it might be fun. ;D

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